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Quotes by David Andrew Bardes

1. Success comes from repeated failure, so fail harder and more often.
2. Your job for God is to fight demons, not be demons.
3. If telling the truth does not help you, you are doing something wrong.
4. Patience is a weapon few master.
5. Your enemy's greatest fear is not that you have attacked, rather you have not attacked yet.
6. In life, you deal with what God gives you, and not what you want God to give you.
7. Before men are men, they are selfish human beings; before women are women, they are selfish human beings.
8. There are only two ways to defeat any enemy, the bloody way, or the buddy way.
9. The greatest threat to justice is not injustice, rather those whom do the injustice.
10. Some men believe women only exist to have sex with, and to get pregnant. Which would only be true, if men only existed to have sex with, and get women pregnant.
11. You become good by doing away with the bad. Lack of bad, is good.
12. The problem with God is all he cares about is you.
13. A man meets his God at times of great adversity.
14. You can find God at the intersection of life and death.
15. It is a man's actions that prove his character, not his words.
16. If you are unable to do the hard things in life, you will not survive.
17. War cannot make peace, you use peace to make peace.
18. The best teacher in life is pain, misery, and hardship.
19. Men learn best by pain, misery, and hardship. While women figure out a path to the goal without pain, misery, and hardship.
20. Something is only impossible until someone does it.
21. You keep Satan out by not letting him in.
22. The arrogance of the haughty knows no bounds until death comes knocking on their door. Then they become afraid, and terrified.
23. A happy life does not mean every day is happy.
24. You climb the tallest mountain by taking many tiny steps.
25. If you find a golden nugget, do you not return to the same stream?
26. In a darkened house do you not carry the candle out in front of you, so that all can see?
27. The single common denominator of successful people is they never gave up.
28. Litigating lawsuits is like dancing in a ballroom, but you can never stop dancing nor ever leave the ballroom.
29. If you want to change the world, do not wait for someone's permission, just go ahead and change the world.
30. Life is a roller coaster that is guaranteed to crash.
31. The wisdom of the wrinkles is more beautiful than the brevity of youth.
32. Just keep on going, until God says stop.
33. For every tear shed here on earth, you earn reward in heaven.
34. If you turn up the heat slowly enough, no one will notice until they are all cooked.
35. God exists because we exist. Without proof of us, there would be no proof of God.
36. The first radical feminist in history was Jesus Christ.
37. The greatest thing about women is they are not men.
38. The moment Satan knows you like something; he will work to take it away.
39. The hearts of Democrats are only a little bit larger than the hearts of Republicans, because both are very small.
40. I have been training my dog to speak English words. So far she can say ruff, arf, and woof.
41. Hindsight is for losers, while foresight is for winners.
42. Every mountain has more than one way to climb to the top. One way will be the easiest, one the hardest. Start with the easiest way.
43. Your real life does not start until this life ends, when you are born again into a better life, than ever before.
44. The more money you give away on earth, the more friends you will have in heaven.
45. Once you pull a hot iron out of the fire, you have to strike it while it is hot, and before it cools down, and becomes unchangeable no matter how many strikes.
46. God's most often used trick to get humans to pray to him is "airplane turbulence."
47. If you want something big, you have to do something big.
48. If you do not plan for something big, you will not get the big.
49. What a website says, and what a website does, are two different things.
50. The only thing that lasts on the Internet, is the Internet.
51. Are you enjoying life, or is life enjoying you?
52. Never fear because Jesus is near.
53. This life is half heaven, and half hell. The next life is all heaven, and no hell.
54. A man's character can never exceed beyond that of his sexual weakness.
55. Sexual weakness is a weakness.
56. Time and patience seem to produce the most justice.
57. Family court treats women as if they were kept whores and the men as if their pimps.
58. Inhale Jesus, exhale Satan. Repeat.
59. It is better to tolerate the sins of our neighbors, else in the name of God we do Satan's work.
60. People will not listen to you until they see that you listen to yourself first.
61. The key to a good life in a small town, is to tip your barber well.
62. A leader's job is to kick the stones off of his path, thus leaving behind a road for others to follow.
63. If a large boulder is blocking your path, chip off the edges, until it is round, then let it roll down the hill under its own weight.
64. A gut feeling is something that happens after someone punches you in the gut.
65. Saying nothing, says a lot.
66. If you have knowledge that something is wrong; and you do nothing to fix it; you end up owning it.
67. If you want to move mountains, do it one handful at a time.
68. Fathers keep their children alive, and out of jail, by encouraging greatness on them with loving support.
69. If you ever feel like you cannot hang on any longer, realize you are hanging on; the advice is do not let go.
70. The test of any legislation is not measured in how many people it will benefit, but rather in how many people it will injure.
71. I am not a body. I am not what you see. I am a spirit inside a body.
72. I have shed myself of all Christianity, as all I need is Jesus Christ.
73. The fear is not of the falcon, rather the falconer.
74. Gun's do not kill, bullets kill.
75. The worst pain on earth is the best pain in hell. The best feeling on earth is the least feeling in heaven.
76. If you won't kill me for my sins, I won't kill you for yours, deal?
77. If man evolved from apes, why do we still have apes? Why did they get cheated?
78. Bury your enemies with their own fear.
79. You cannot claim the high ground by taking the low road.
80. Politicians create victims who then need their help.
81. Politics is an oily slime that soap cannot seem to wash off.
82. It seems common sense is not that common.
83. The most successful gamblers are the ones that decide not to gamble, as at the end of the day they still have their money. Buying a second lottery ticket does not double your chances of winning, rather it doubles your losses.
84. People who have a heart for inmates, are the best people to have as friends. For if they love sinners, look how much more they love you.
85. Doing what is right, eventually gets done.
86. Money does not make you happy, but it sure does try.
87. I can only tell you what I see with my eyes, I cannot tell you what you see with your eyes.
88. Vote them in, tear them down, run them out of town, vote them in, tear them down, run them out of town, repeat every four years.
89. Peace first, war last.
90. Of all the enemies you do not want, do not be your own worst enemy, be nice to yourself, compliment yourself, exhort yourself, and enjoy yourself.
91. If you keep telling yourself something over and over again for a long enough period of time there is a chance you may eventually believe yourself.
92. Your fate is yours; God chose it just for you.
93. Do not fear death, as it is only death; fear the God that you meet after your death.
94. You belong to the kids; the kids do not belong to you.
95. I am a fellow warrior on the battlefield of life.
96. Most crime is borne out of desperation, if we solve the desperation, we don't get the crime.
97. What replaces physical beauty as we age is wisdom, knowledge, and character that is more attractive than appearance and treasured far more than gold.
98. Why is it when the wrath of God becomes evident, it is always the innocent that die?
99. To reject science is to insult God.
100. Always shoot for the stars so you will settle for the moon, because if you only shoot for the moon you may end up with a low orbit satellite.
101. If you cannot conquer yourself, you cannot conquer anything.
102. A man in love is a fool.
103. The good news is there is a decrease in the increase of bad news.
104. What comes from the earth returns to the earth, what comes from heaven returns to heaven.
105. Your real life does not begin until the day your body dies. The happiest day of your life will be the day your body dies.
106. People who work in prisons, spend their life in prison.
107. Well written words on paper can crush stone, melt steel, move mountains, defeat armies, and change the world.
108. If someone does something bad to you, do something good to them.
109. God cannot tell us things in advance, because if God told us, Satan would listen too, then Satan would counteract to defeat God. God is counting on us not knowing what is going to happen.
110. With great suffering comes a flood of wisdom.
111. People who say captains must always go down with their ships, should never become captains.
112. Dogs, and the variety of dogs, proves God's sense of humor.
113. How to walk away from your troubles: Take a pad of paper and write down each of your problems, in full detail. Fill the whole pad if necessary. Open a drawer, put the pad of paper inside the drawer, then close the drawer, and walk away from your troubles.
114. If Satan can render you useless using only conspiracy theories, he will.
115. Once you understand that death is a reward, you gain courage unmatched in the universe.
116. If lawyers could charge their fees for vacuuming your carpet, they would never stop vacuuming your carpet.
117. The selfishness of women is so vast and unending; it has only been outdone by the selfishness of men.
118. Civic Duties: My primary civic duty is to protect your rights so you can protect mine, because without either of us we have no rights.
119. We are a nation of too many laws.
120. There can be no public prayer. Amen.
121. If you want to know where God is leading you, turn around and examine the path you are on. And ask yourself, where does this path lead? And what provisions must I accumulate along the way to make it past pitfalls, and to journey's end?
122. Does hating someone in the name of Jesus make God happy, or Satan happy?
123. God's three most beloved people on earth, are first you, of course, but in second place comes you, obviously, and then finally comes you, which you already knew.
124. You must forgive other's sins, or you do yourself in.
125. The leading cause of divorce is marriage.
126. If you want people to love you, love them first, and they will then love you back; forever.
127. If God wants you to jump up and down three times, you will be jumping up and down three times, not knowing why.
128. If you want to make God happy, and Satan mad, fall to your knees, lift your hands up to heaven and proclaim "Praise God!"
129. Family court is a machine of death, it maims and destroys without rhyme or reason, until it's sickening work is done.
130. Why we cannot bring God into government: If you ever brought God anywhere near government, the prison doors would swing wide open, judges would declare everyone innocent, cop's guns would turn into flowers, and all taxes would be eliminated.
131. Those who pursue sex, end up screwed.
132. You defeat your enemy, by making them your friend. Therefore, the fastest way to defeat all of your enemies, is to make all of them your friends.
133. When you climb in bed with Satan, no condom will protect you.

Copyright © 2010-2023 by David Andrew Bardes
Jul 24th 2024 11:37am ET